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"Man of Style and Substance"
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The boastful Phoebus, Captain of the Guards, delivers this rocking paean to himself. The perfect anthem for every self-centered egotist one has ever known.

Man of Style and Substance
(lyrics and music by Rainey)
(Sung by Phoebus:)

I had a suspicion
Of a higher ambition
And a personal volition from the day I was born
I thrive on opposition
And healthy competition
But only as long as I'm the only one who's won
I found winning all important
So much more so concordant
With a positive self-image than just playing the game
It might sound harsh and unfeeling of me
But when you think it through I believe you'll see
The Program
If others find they have to make the sacrifice
So I could come out on top with the prize
Then how fortunate they are to be part of the plan
Of a superior man, a Man of Style and Substance

Regrets I never suffered
Apologies I never, ever uttered
My existence is at once a vindicating defense
Being raised the family favorite
No doubt aided the attainment
Of an awareness of my own unique and glorious sense
Saintly people live for others
This concern for weaker brothers
Is like an echo of the mighty love I feel for myself
Mine and Mankind's finish lines are the same
I'm a quarterback in a win-win situation
Rules were only made to be broken by me
I was meant to be a cut above conformity
The Realization of the Higher Plan
The True Ubermensch, it's a cinch, I got Style and Substance

As one might suspect I'm religious to the highest degree
I often bow my head and thank the Lord in all sincerity
It says in the Bible and it really makes sense
I was created to be a reflection of God's Own Image
But I bet I look more like Him as a much younger Man
And I know it must comfort and please Him no end
To gaze upon an ultimate creative success
Just look! I'm the best! I'm a Man of Style and Substance

And if you want to be in on the winning hand
Then my friend you better start getting in with the plan
You better jump on my train or get out of my way
If you need the job done, call the man of Style and Substance

As civilization keeps on rolling along
The Creme de la Creme are all singing this song
The world is our oyster and we are the Pearls
The master race unfurls, we got Style and Substance
We got Style and Substance
So much Style and substance
We got Style and substance!

END
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